Yello.

Apparently for some odd reason you want to know about my life. Ohhkaay.

I am a socially awkward turtle from New York who has an unhealthy obsession with 5 gorgeous guys.

I have watched the movie Tangled about 150 times.  I say it’s because the kids I babysit make me watch it. That’s a lie.

I think Mean Girls is probably the most quotable movie off all time. “Don’t have sex, you will  get pregnant and you will die.”

Err… I have convinced myself that I am going to marry Zayn Malik.  And Harry Styles.  And Louis Tomlinson.  And Liam Payne. Annnndd Niall Horan.  All at once.  It’ll be like Brother Husbands and I will NOT get arrested because we will be so in love that it would pain anyone to break us up.

My parents think I’m depressed, but they’re just irritating.

To Do List:

1. Save $1,000.
2. Buy a plane ticket to London.
3. Move to London.
4. Stalk One Direction until I find them.
5. Marry all of them.
6. Never go back home.
7. Visit my family 10 years later with a British accent.

Sounds reasonable, right?

My parents also think this 1D thing is a phase.  Little do they know, it’s a lifestyle.

I’m not very funny, but I’m pretty forking good with sarcasm.  Robyn Duncan makes up for my lack of hilariousness.

I’m on the crew team.  Row, row, row your boat.  Because I’m a cool cat and I absolutely suck at every other sport I try to do.  Even though I’m afraid of water.  Well, water with fish in it.  Or any type of animal that might get remotely close to me.

I am officially going to die alone as a fat lady with 103 cats. It’s a known fact.

I am afraid of the following things:

1. Worms.
2. Fish.
3. Belugas.
4. Mirrors.
5. Not marrying One Direction.
6. Fish.
7. Pedophiles.
8. My basement and attic at night, I’m pretty sure there are homeless people living in there.
9. Fish.

So yeah…That’s all. Kbye.